Who Were You Calling?

My phone rang, and I answered.

“Hello?”

“Who are you?” the caller asked.

I thought I had misunderstood. The person who had called me was asking me to identify myself before explaining whom he had intended to reach.

“Who were you trying to call?” I asked.

“Who are you?”

I repeated my question.

He repeated his.

For a while, the conversation became a machine with only two available sentences. The telephone network was working perfectly; the people using it had stopped making progress.

Eventually he answered.

“My father.”

This was technically information, but not very useful information. I still did not know who his father was, which number he wanted, or why I had suddenly become responsible for solving the mystery.

I hung up.

A moment later, the phone rang again.

“Hello?”

“Who are you?”

This time the conversation was shorter.

Wrong numbers usually create tiny accidental meetings between strangers. Most end politely after ten seconds. This one required two calls and still never reached the stage where either of us learned anything useful.

Years later, I still think the first responsibility belongs to the person who places the call.

If you call a stranger and ask, “Who are you?”

the fairest answer may simply be:

“The person you called.”