Never Touch Your Idols - The Gilding Will Stick

There is an old warning that says, “Never touch your idols. The gilding will stick to your fingers.”

I understand it as a warning about idealization. From a distance, people can look perfect.

A writer becomes only the beautiful sentences. A scientist becomes only the discoveries. A leader becomes only the achievements. We remove the ordinary, difficult, and unpleasant parts until the person becomes an image.

Then we get closer. The image changes. Maybe the person is selfish. Maybe they are insecure. Maybe some of the stories we admired were exaggerated.

Disappointment follows because the real person cannot compete with the version we created. I do not think the lesson is to stop admiring people. Admiration can be useful. Someone else’s work can show us what is possible. The danger begins when inspiration becomes worship.

A person can create something brilliant and still have serious weaknesses. Both can be true at the same time. This also applies to the way we judge ourselves. We compare our whole life with the polished part of someone else’s life and wonder why we feel incomplete. That comparison is unfair.

Nobody lives as a statue. People are contradictory, emotional, inconsistent, and unfinished. Maybe admiration becomes healthier when we admire specific qualities instead of entire people. I can respect someone’s discipline without needing every part of their character to be perfect. That feels more realistic. And reality may be less shiny than gold, but at least it does not stick to our fingers.